Sometimes a year turns too fast… before you wink the eye, it turns and calendar shows another year… Grief, sickness or sorrow whatever… Time waits for no one…i learned many lessons this year, most importantly forgotten many sermons/lessons/practices this year too… Just to make way for new things …
My Stumbling Blocks 2013:
· It gets so tough when you allow depression into body and soul… like sponge it takes whole of your system and when even a casual remark squeeze gets all teary and emotional.
· Depression is so tough in a disabled body. You simply are not allowed to feel low, body gives too many signals… Than the best GPS in the world.
· Khalil Gibran said- work is love made visible…. Why I didn’t hear that and got attached to people and be dumped by them?
· Disability is so expensive, the more the years to come and the more cost mounts up. So the more you make your work sells in the hay time, the better. Learned that hard way.
· I always fail to understand why people attach so much importance to just body and its abilities. This year also I failed to understand and miserably failed to help some friends.
· Even the most charitable ones, always feels charity SHOULD NOT BEGIN AT THEIR OWN HOME. Like anand always say… people want Gandhi/Christ to born in their neighbor’s home, not theirs… Period!
· I lose some close people to my heart, physically, virtually and emotionally. The loss is mine too..! some are just became memory, some became my rage , but always in my thought
· I failed to convince some important donors the importance of continuity of funds in disability management and rural development.. Both are a life time works… not just a one day charity. The fault is mine and I should learn more ways of presenting my case!
· You are super abled disabled – that’s why you don’t understand priorities and limitations to your health- anand says – SO TRUE
· I REALISED I DIDN’T HAVE REAL CAREER..! SO I THINK THIS FAILURE GOES ON..!
BORED WITH MY FAILURE LIST… HUH….NOW READ MY SO CALLED ACHIEVEMENT LIST..!
My Mile Stones 2013:
· Half the year suffered with extreme pain… needed help to toss from one side to another, seriously thought of permanent solution to persistent pain.. there were pitch dark days. I could get it reversed and today walking with sheer support of doctors, my husband and friends like you all.
· Children under our direct care reached 265 in number. 50 children in our hostel, and rest in tribal hamlets
· Undertook new tribal hamlet work consisting families of quarry workers, left and neglected children belonging to cultural identity of Chhattisgarh, Bihar, Orissa, living in Andhra Pradesh. For me, divisions wont effect hearts… children are children. Education is education. Thanks to the donors and leaders who believed that I can give them a better future.
· Enrolled 185 volunteers in vizag city for the help of disabled and aged. We just touched a tip of the iceberg. Let’s see what the youth can do.
· Reduced weight… Still have to see how much!
· Dumped negativity caused by others actions and inactions… a senior said – you are not able to manage your health and your works, don’t you think negativity is an extra baggage you can’t afford and highly taxable in long run.. YES SIR .. YOU ARE RIGHT..!
· Depression and inactiveness can be quite creative sometimes. Wrote 7 stories in telugu so far and every story got published. Thanks to everyone who supported my literary work, friends, editors, web magazine editors ( Kowmudi,Eemaata,saranga, vaakili,Radio tharanga,, Print Editions like Andhra Jyothi, serious organizations like NATS ( who gave me a prize for my story, my mom would have been happy)
· From forever soar throat and lung infections to singing – sang two songs in prestigious orchestra in Visakhapatnam.
· From 24/7 wheelchair to now 22/7 in wheelchair. Don’t you see the difference two hours of walking?
· Tried to convince Hotels in Visakhapatnam – the power of swimming as hydro therapy and made the way for my swimming. Learning it now. ( though I am almost tanned like crow )
· STARTED MY LEGAL (tax attorney and civil and criminal)PRACTICE AGAIN… FREE FOR DISABLED, AS A PROFESSION FOR OUTSIDERS. THANKS TO MY SENIOR KRISHNAKUMAR BHAGAWATHI, AP High Court,FOR GIVING ME AN OPPORTUNITY AND TRUST MY ABILITY AS LAWYER.
· LOVE MAKES MIRACLES, UNDERSTANDING AND SUPPORT MAKES EVERY IMPOSSIBLE THEM’POSSIBLE..!!
HMMM…. LIFE IS NOT THAT BAD, THANKS TO MY FAMILY WHO IS ALWAYS SUPPORTIVE OF ME, AND FRIENDS (THIS PIC OF US DONE BY KRISHNA MOHAN GORLE WITH A WARNING THAT .. SAI.. YOU ARE NOT AT ALL WELL POSED IN NOT EVEN ONE OF THE PICS… AGREED MY DEAR.. LIKE MY LIFE… EVERYTHING IS ABSTRACT PAINTING AND VERY MUCH SKEWED.. IT ‘S JUST BECOMES BEAUTIFUL WITH YOUR LOVE .. MORE WORKS AND MORE PICS IN FUTURE.. LOVE YOU BOTH)
ICING ON THE CAKE: MY ACCUPUNCTURIST AND DOCTOR SAID- IF YOU BEHAVE WELL LIKE THIS (meaning patiently coming to endless needle sessions with 180 needles all over legs and spine) YOU CAN WALK WITH ONE LEG BRACE AND ONE FREE LEG SOON…!!
HAPPY NEW YEAR FRIENDS… MAY IMPOSSIBLE BE HAPPEN IN YOUR LIVES WITH COMPASSION AND EMPATHY..!! MAY EVERY DREAM OF YOURS COME TRUE ..!! HAPPY NEW YEAR 2014
(pic Courtesy Krishna Mohan Gorle- https://www.facebook.com/kmgclicks)